


oh my god, they were roommates

by QueenWithABeeThrone



Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Daredevil (TV), Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Character Transformed into Cat, Crack, Crack Crossover, Gen, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-05
Updated: 2018-06-05
Packaged: 2019-05-18 13:14:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 817
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14853443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenWithABeeThrone/pseuds/QueenWithABeeThrone
Summary: “No, seriously,” Han’s saying, “what the hell kinda shit do you even keep in your fridge?”“What kind of roommate are you, Solo,” Percy’s snapping right back, “that you’d go snooping in my room?”or: Claire regrets putting a Craigslist ad up for roommates.





	oh my god, they were roommates

**Author's Note:**

> I don't think I have to tell you guys where the title's from.
> 
> originally for the fifteen characters meme on Tumblr. [original post.](http://skymurdock.tumblr.com/post/172341693498/i-forgot-to-send-a-prompt-ok-lemme-try-this)

“What,” says Claire, looking at the blind kitten on the counter, “the _fuck_.”

“Don’t look at me,” says Han, folding his arms across his chest. He’s wearing an exceedingly smug expression, the little shit, and Claire inhales, exhales. “For once, this mess isn’t my fault.”

And the hell of it is, Han’s right. It’s not even Matt’s fault, although in all honesty Claire wouldn’t have been surprised if it was. Matt is just special like that—the Daredevil suit currently lying in a sad puddle on the kitchen floor is one indication. Apparently Matt had been in it when the thing happened.

Matt, sitting on the counter, meows unhappily. He’s a cute little guy, with a notched ear, pink nose and dark fuzz all over. Claire would be cuddling him right now, if she didn’t know he was Matt. She’s kind of tempted to, honestly, he _is_ very cute.

Han frowns at Matt. “What was that?” he says. “That didn’t sound good. That _really_ didn’t sound good.”

“Don’t look at me, I can’t talk to animals,” says Claire, annoyed.

“Yeah, between my blind roommate being Daredevil, my nurse roommate running a makeshift clinic for vigilantes, and the roommate I thought was kinda sane telling me he knows _fucking magic_ —” Han starts, voice climbing higher and higher in volume and pitch as he goes. His gestures get more expansive too, and Claire has to duck as he flings a hand out towards Percy.

“Not that much magic,” says Percy, whose fault this absolutely is, since it’s _his_ fridge that Matt drank out of. He looks—well, he doesn’t look any crankier than he usually is, which isn’t helped by the shock of white hair. If he hadn’t told her she would have thought he was older than fifty, not barely twenty-three. “I was only keeping those for my friend—”

Matt hisses. His tiny little paw darts out and gets Percy’s knuckle.

“Ow!” Percy draws his hand back, a slight trickle of blood oozing from the wound Matt's tiny paw inflicted. “This isn’t my fault, Murdock, I was very clear in telling all of you not to open my fridge!”

“Oh,” says Han, “yeah, ‘bout that? I might’ve sorta borrowed something last week.”

“What,” says Percy, deadly calm, “did you borrow?”

“Forget the fridge,” says Claire, “though you’ve got a point, and god, I can’t believe I’m about to say this—why do you put magic potions in Gatorade bottles? What the hell?”

“I put labels on them!” Percy snaps back. “Pardon me for using _my personal refrigerator_ for _my own personal storage_ , instead of the refrigerator we all eat from.”

Matt, still a kitten, gives a yowl and tries to swipe at Percy again. He doesn’t quite make it, and instead nearly topples over the side of the counter. Claire dives, catching him in her hands, and heroically manages not to yelp in pain when little tiny claws dig into her skin. “No scratching!” she scolds him.

Matt meows again, softer this time.

“No, seriously,” Han’s saying, “what the hell kinda shit do you even keep in your fridge?”

“What kind of roommate are you, Solo,” Percy’s snapping right back, “that you’d go snooping in my room?”

“A hungry kind!”

“Guys, shut up,” says Claire. “We can yell at each other later. And believe me, there’s _so much_ I want to yell at you both about.” Han’s little “side job” comes to mind, as does whatever Percy gets up to that Claire keeps finding black powder in the bathroom. “But first—we need to fix Matt.”

Matt meows in agreement.

Han drums his fingers on the counter. “I mean, I dunno,” he says. “Kinda like him better this way.”

Matt, in answer, hacks up a hairball onto the carpet. Judging from his peeved meow, Claire’s pretty sure he’d been aiming for Han, instead.

“Yeah, okay,” says Han, hurriedly, backing away, “you, Percival Freddie Von Something Whatever-your-last-name-is, this is _your_ fault, _you_ fix it. Turn him back with whatever fucked-up mumbo-jumbo that bottle had.”

“I can’t do that,” says Percy, “my expertise is in another field entirely.” He pauses, then sighs and says, “I may be able to call someone, though. Her name’s Keyleth, she’s much more adept at magic than I am.”

“Well, clearly,” says Claire, acidly, “or else we wouldn’t even be in this mess.”

“But after this,” Percy continues, glaring at Matt the kitten, who makes a respectable attempt at glaring back at him despite being blind and also _a cat_ , “I need an explanation for the Daredevil suit on my kitchen floor.”

“ _Your_ kitchen floor?” says Han, supremely offended over completely the wrong thing. As per usual.

Matt gives a mournful yowl. Claire sighs, and gives in to the urge to scratch lightly behind his ears. She smiles to herself when he purrs, despite the situation.

“Yeah, I miss living alone too, Matt,” she says.

**Author's Note:**

> prompt from this-was-a-terrible-idea: _Characters: 2, 5, 7, and 12. Prompt: All the characters are roomates, and three of them find out one of the characters (your choice) can do magic when one of the three roomates (again, up to you) accidentally drinks a potion in a random sports drink bottle from the magic-using character's personal mini fridge and gets turned into an animal (again of your choice)_


End file.
